Master Effective 1:1 Meetings for Leadership Success
Learn how to build trust and develop your team with structured 1:1 meetings. Start leading effectively today!
The following is an excerpt from our June 2024 issue of Hey Leader.
Hey Leader, crafted with thought & care by The Perk, is a monthly email series all with the intention to help you lead better. You belong here!
Hey, Leader —
Show of hands: when you first became a manager or leader, how many of you were told by your leaders that it was critical to schedule one-on-one (1:1) meetings with your direct reports?
Of course, you scheduled them. If they were critical, who were you to argue?
But did anyone ever really…tell you how to conduct them?
If you answered “no,” I feel you. That was very much my experience as a brand-new leader. I knew it was important to have these meetings, but I didn’t always know what I should be doing with that time.
Was it just a meeting for status updates?
Do I need to be talking the whole time?
Can I ask how my team members are doing, or does it have to be strictly business?
Over time, I learned the answers to those three questions were 1) no, 2) nope nope NOPE, & 3) ALWAYS ask how your team members are doing.
Several years & many 1:1’s later, I now know that 1:1’s build trust faster than anything else at an organization. Why? Because it’s intentional time you’re spending connecting & forming a relationship with another person. It’s a time to really see your employees, hear them, & value them. And, it’s an opportunity to demonstrate that you care about them both personally & professionally.
Trust building is important on its own, but wait…there’s more. The time you spend in 1:1’s with your team members is an opportune time to coach them for development. As we’ve discussed before, coaching is what leadership is all about.
To help them get unstuck, make progress, & grow. To explore, learn, & gain clarity.
To help them commit to action that will truly move the needle at your organization.
To celebrate the CRAP out of them & tell them how amazing they are.
When we coach leaders at The Perk, we spend a fair amount of time talking about running great 1:1 meetings—& here are the three biggest actions we stress the most:
Clarify the purpose of your 1:1’s. It’s tempting to just jump in & start doing them, but like most things in life, effective 1:1’s require a little planning.
First, reflect on a time in your career when you had an incredible 1:1 with your leader. What made it so great? What did your leader do? Similarly, think of those “meh” 1:1’s you’ve had in your career. What did your leader do or not do? Or, what did YOU do or not do?
Second, visualize a GREAT 1:1. Imagine you just completed an incredible 1:1 with one of your direct reports. What happened that created those results? What behaviors did you exhibit as a leader, & what behaviors did they exhibit? What was the feeling in the room? Last, clarify impact. What do you want the impact of your 1:1’s to be? What do you want to happen as a result?Give your 1:1’s a structure: At The Perk, we adhere to what we call the “10-80-10”:
The first 10% of the 1:1 is focused on connecting & discussing big picture items. (In our experience, it’s better to start with the big stuff and work your way down into the details!).
The middle 80% of the 1:1’s for learning, coaching, & exploration. Every team member at The Perk prepares for their 1:1’s by filling out a session prep form. The reason for this is that team members should be self-reflective & come prepared for what they want to talk about to make progress (more on that below!).
The final 10% of the 1:1 is for commitment to action & celebration. Ask your team members: what are they going to take from the session & put into action—& what will the impact be for them personally, for the team, & for the organization? Our team also takes time to celebrate—either they share with me what they want to celebrate, or I proactively celebrate them & share why.
Have your team prepare. 1:1’s get a bad rap. I’ve lost track of how many leaders & employees have told me they’re a “waste of time.” Here’s some tough love: they’re a waste of time because you’re doing it wrong. One of the biggest mistakes I see people make is to not prepare for 1:1’s. Again, here’s where the 1:1 Prep Form comes in—read below for the prompts we put in ours!
Oof. This is getting long—but hey—I LOVE talking about 1:1’s.
Prompts for 1:1 Prep Forms!
1:1 Prep Forms are an absolute game-changer. It gives your team members time to reflect on the progress they’ve made since their last meeting with you, & it also helps them get clear on what they want to discuss in this session. At The Perk, we ask that our team completes their prep forms at least 24 hours in advance—this way, you have a chance to look at their answers & you’re not going into the conversation cold, either.
Below are examples of the eight Prep Form prompts we use. Feel free to copy them completely, or edit them to fit your own leadership brand & the culture you’re creating!
What I’ve accomplished since our last 1:1:
The impact of those accomplishments:
The challenges and problems I’m facing now:
One thing I’m celebrating right now:
One thing I failed at recently, how I reacted, and what I learned:
The opportunities in front of me now:
How I want to use this 1:1:
As my leader, it’s important for you to know:
As always, we’d love to hear if you use these prompts, & how they work for you!
What's The Perk saying?
Our media selections this month focus on ways to build relationship & maximize the impact of your time with your team through powerful meetings!
7 min read
25 min activity
30 min watch
What's our community saying?
We’re always soaking in the latest news & insights on culture, organizational development, & leadership. This month’s resources focus on how to use your 1:1 time wisely, engage your teams, & empower them to grow!
7 min read
Matt Mayberry | Harvard Business Review
60 min listen
The Conversation Factory podcast
9 min watch
The Predictive Index
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About The Perk
We're a premiere leadership & culture development studio.
The skills your leaders need today are very different from the ones they needed 5 years ago. We equip leaders with the skills they need to confidently & effectively lead their teams now & going forward.
And we have quite a lot of fun doing it!